Where DOES the Time Go?

It's November 1st.  Man.

This is what has been happening, going backwards.

8. Larry's suspicious mole was BENIGN!

7. Hurricane Sandy. We had lots of WIND, some rain, no power for a few hours and no damage to the house. As you know, others did not fare so well. My cousin in Hastings-on-Hudson downstate lost big oak trees in his yard. One fell in the road taking down power lines and blocking the road and they won't have power for many days.

6. I found out from an x-ray that I broke a bone in my foot when I fell nearly three weeks ago. The crack is between the second and third toes. It hurts! The doctor said take ibuprofen and wear firm shoes so my toes don't bend. What? No cast? No nothing? Suck it up.

5. Larry had the suspicious mole removed.

4. Went to Larry's work party at Oak Hill Country Club. Yeah the one where famous golf tournaments are played. I was intimidated but at least I looked better with my hair that I have looked in months!

3. Fell and broke my toe/foot the same day as the party. I limped around.

2. Enjoyed an OUTSTANDING General Conference.

1. We celebrated our 31st wedding anniversary. Imagine.

And I'm teaching seminary twice a week!

OH YEAH- I was diagnosed with Celiac Disease after the endoscopy and biopsy. It has been oh so fun trying to figure out what to eat every day. But I can eat.

Life is good.

Another spirit heads to heaven

Larry's mother Lee Etta passed away last week. She was a nice lady. When we built our house in 1993 we added an apartment on so Larry's parents could live with us. It was a good thing!

Lee Etta was born in Avon, NY in 1919. She was the middle of three children. She and Larry's father, (who was also Larry) were married in 1945. My Larry came along in 1946. I asked why they didn't have any more children and she said, "I figured we would only have one and raise him right." She did an excellent job with her one, although she would have done the same with others, no doubt.

In many ways she was a very strong woman, but she also had many fears that limited her enjoyment of life. But if you were her friend, you had a friend for life. She was kind and generous. The picture below is of Lee Etta and us at our 25th wedding anniversary party. She knew that there was no one to throw us a party, so SHE did it! 

The last several months were hard for her. She was failing quickly and we finally had to move her to a hospice home on August 27. She was okay with it. She told me that she knew she couldn't have stayed home any longer and that she was happy there. She lived there 12 days and she passed away on September 8.

The home is called Aurora House. It is a two bed comfort care home for the dying. It actually was a pleasure to go there every day. So much nicer than a nursing home or  hospital. It actually felt like a home.

She passed away peacefully, a year after our little Elbie the Cat died, almost to the day. I think that is sweet.

We lived together for over 19 years. We watched the Yankees together, Nascar and golf, too. We got along great. I'll miss her.

Color Me Happy

Best time of year. By far.

Next.........

The other blood work came back positive for Celiac Disease. My doctor says that if it truly is positive, it will be a major lifestyle change. So he wants me to have a small intestine biopsy to verify the diagnosis.

WHAT?

I'm Italian. I eat bread.

If this is true, I will be eating blueberries the rest of my life. Larry and I went out for some MAJOR DELICIOUS Mexican food tonight, just in case I can never eat it again as long as I live. Or pasta. Or pizza. Or Italian bread. You might as well just lock me up.

Sorry cow. Go away.

SO.






After 50 years, I finally have an answer to my spastic unmentionables.






I'm LACTOSE INTOLERANT.


Such a deal.

After all these years, my whole life actually, somebody decided to test me for it. And the blood test came back with this lovely diagnosis. I knew it because of what happened AFTER the blood test!!

See, you go in fasting for 12 hours and get your blood drawn. Then you get to drink this glass of milk flavored with some orange stuff. It tasted pretty good. Then you wait 15 minutes and get your blood drawn again. Then you wait 30 minutes and get your blood drawn AGAIN. That's three so far. Then you wait another 30 minutes and get your blood drawn AGAIN. THENNNNNNN, you wait 45 minutes and get your blood drawn AGAIN. That is 5, count 'em 5 blood draws in 2 hours.

After the two hours I got to leave. I couldn't get home fast enough, if you get the idea. The next several hours were VERRRRY interesting.

It's kind of funny because even as a kid, I didn't like milk and gave my parents a hard time about drinking it. I was never crazy about ice cream. I do not like yogurt, yuk. Never liked mozzarella on pizza. So the signs were there but I never considered lactose intolerance.

There is hidden lactose in so many foods, (and medicine too.) I need to become a detective and read all labels carefully.

I am so excited about feeling good!! Hooray for no pain. When you've had major gut pain frequently for almost your whole life, it's a lovely prospect.

Goodbye cow.

A Week to Remember

Tuesday May 8, 2012 

Off I went to Salt Lake City with my friend Gail. She went to visit family, and me, well I headed off to the Family History Library to find my ancestors!

These are my grandfather's parents. (Isn't great-grandpa cute? He looks like my father.) The records in the city of Agrigento Sicily are not too good; they are in most cases almost illegible. I knew it would be like finding a needle in a haystack.

Nicolina D'Amato and Gerlando Cardella, my great-grandparents.  I needed to find his parents.

After an uneventful and pleasant flight to Salt Lake, Gail left with her daughter and I went to the library to begin the search that almost killed exhausted me.

The place where miracles happen.

ANYhow, 

after a couple of hours of getting my bearings and beginning the search, Sister Graham and I went to the temple. It had been 20 years since I had been to Salt Lake City. I had forgotten how incredibly beautiful the temple is. I was SO GLAD to be there!

Wednesday May 9

Poured through microfilms. Prayed.

Thursday May 10

Poured through microfilms. Prayed.

Friday May 11

Poured through microfilms. PRAYED.

Despite finding clues during my search and having invaluable help from my pal Mary Anne Graham, I got very discouraged. I knew the Lord had sent me there to find this family but after thousands, hundreds, MANY hours of searching, every muscle in my body ached. My eyes were blurry. I was hungry, thirsty and tired every day. Mary said to me on one of those days, "You still have time." My impatience was getting the best of me.

Sometime during those days, (they are a blur to me) we went to the new City Creek Center for lunch. We walked through Temple Square a lot. We went to the new Deseret Bookstore which knocked my socks off. Being on Temple Square was good for me and kept me focused although I was discouraged.

One day I talked to Larry about it. My body was SO sore. He gave me beautiful advice. He said, "Why don't you pray for endurance?" I thought of the pioneers. If they could walk across the country, I could sit at a microfilm reader.

After Mary was done with her shift at the library Friday, she sat with me and we both looked through films. About an hour before closing time Friday night I heard her softly call my name. I looked at her and she said, "I found them." I buried my head in my hands and thanked God for endurance and a good friend who helped me.

Saturday May 12

Relief! I had much more research to do but I wasn't frantic. We walked to the Blue Iguana for a grand Mexican lunch that was a much needed break. Loved it!

Saturday night we went to the Conference Center theater to see Alex Boye, a member of the Tabernacle Choir. He does shows and tours the country. I thought he would sing choir type songs and be all reverent. Boy was I wrong! The guy is a comedian and sings all types of songs. It was a fabulous show!! He tells his life story too, about joining the church as a kid and going on a mission. Just the best.




Sunday May 13

We started out at the Tabernacle to see "Music and the Spoken Word." I was astounded at the whole production. I had never heard the choir in person so what a treat THAT was!  But for the program, the Tabernacle turns into a recording studio because the program is broadcast all over the country, maybe the world. LOVED IT!

That's me in the Tabernacle after the program. Man, those grandma arms are killin' me.

THEN, highlight ater highlight, this trip was the best. I got to meet my friend of four years for the first time! We were so excited to meet each other! 

Me with my darling friend Katrina. We met through her blog and became friends, hoping we could meet each other someday. This is Sunday morning in front of the Church History Museum. 

So we were happy and looking forward to a great day together. She drove me back to her home in Saratoga Springs where I met her husband Nils, (such a great guy with good manners!) He made us lunch while I got acquainted with the kiddos, Anders, Addie, Aani and Ava. AND their stuffed animals! We walked to church together, listened to great Sacrament talks, had cake in Relief Society for a Mother's Day treat, admired the view of Utah Lake and walked back home. Then we had dinner at Katrina's mom's home where I got to meet a bunch of her family. Great stuff. Check out this picture taken by Nils.

In the front is Aani. Next to her is Addie, Katrina is holding Ava and I've got Anders trapped. Love this family.

I hated saying goodbye to them. But maybe they will come out to New York someday and I will sure be going back to Salt Lake. There is too much work to do at the library not to. And who knows? Maybe we will serve a mission there someday!


Monday May 14

Back to the library for research on Larry's family. NOT enough time! I did take a lunch break to wander around the museum for a while. Loved that, too. Research, dinner at Mary's, talk on the phone, and pack. I felt incredibly blessed and sad to be leaving. Yet I missed Larry and was glad to be going home.

This trip opened my eyes to the power of prayer once again. It also made me want to go on a mission with Larry soon! Like before we are too old and decrepit.


Tuesday May 15

HOME!

Stayin' Alive, Stayin' Alive, Ah Ah Ah Ah

See? I'm not dead. Just out of energy for a while. I think I need a tune-up.

We had a visit from this guy last week- my boyfriend Jayden.

and his mom, our church daughter Trisha.

Dad had to stay home in Kingman, Arizona and go to work.

Since our home is not baby proof (!!) we had a great time preventing our boy from climbing stairs and eating books and falling down the stairs etc....

Larry got to be a grandpa!

We had fun and we miss them.

That was the good part.

The terrible thing that happened is that my friend of over 25 years Linda Witt, succumbed to the oral cancer she had battled for eleven years. Her husband Gary was our friend who died four years ago from a heart attack.

That's Linda (on the far right) in happier times, coming home from "Time Out For Women."


I'm getting tired of so many special people in my life dying.

Whoever you are that is reading this - stay healthy!!!

Thank you.

Happy New Year!

That's about all the post that is in me right now. I really hope that 2012 is a great year for all of you and for us, too. Challenges abound, but like Larry says, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

Oh boy, I'll be Mrs. America!

The Talk I Gave This Morning

This is how I feel -

THANKSGIVING FEAST

NOVEMBER 27 2011

Just three days ago, we celebrated Thanksgiving 2011. I think I’m still full!

Thanksgiving has always been my favorite holiday. To me it meant that I would be spending the day with my grandparents and other members of the family. My grandmother was the most outstanding cook. The dinner that I make MAY turn out really great, but it may not. Hers was always consistently perfect and if I had to choose a last meal it would have been her Thanksgiving dinner. It does seem that Thanksgiving is about feasting, isn’t it? I also believe it is about something that goes right along with feasting, and that is sharing.

For the past few weeks, the grocery stores have been gearing up for the holidays with lots of extra food. When I went to buy our turkey, I noticed that the meat department was offering BIG turkeys - like 18lbs, 20lbs, 25 pound birds! And we the people were buying those big turkeys. What does that mean? I would guess that it means company was coming for dinner! Those who were purchasing turkeys and potatoes and squash and stuffing bread and ingredients for pies were going to be cooking for company. They were going to SHARE their bounty with loved ones. It’s costly to feed a lot of people but we are willing to share our food at a time of giving thanks. We want to have a feast and we want to share it.

I would hope that Jesus would be happy with that. His primary concern was for the people. He healed them, he fed the multitudes, he raised them from the dead, and he taught them, as he teaches us today through the scriptures, through prayer and through a living prophet. He gave, when it seemed he had nothing left to give. He has told us over and over again that without charity we are nothing. So how can we focus on the Savior and become better people during these next few weeks of celebration? And more importantly, how can we carry these wonderful feelings of gratitude when it isn’t Thanksgiving?

One of my favorite scriptures in the Book of Mormon comes from King Benjamin’s address. The first time I read this I was moved, because I had never thought of my life in this way. I love this scripture, it really blew me away. King Benjamin said, "I say unto you, my brethren, that if you should render all the thanks and praise which your whole soul has power to possess, to that God who has created you, and has kept and preserved you, and has caused that ye should rejoice, and has granted that ye should live in peace one with another— I say unto you that if ye should serve him who has created you from the beginning, and is preserving you from day to day, by lending you breath, that ye may live and move and do according to your own will, and even supporting you from one moment to another—I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants." (Mosiah 2:19-21)

We can’t ever thank Him enough. As King Benjamin explains so well, we wouldn’t even have life without Him. But He appreciates it when we care for others. We who have received the gospel of Jesus Christ have much to be thankful for. Even when life is difficult to the point of our being “heavy laden” there are still blessings we can count. We still receive favors from God, those tender mercies that we have heard much about from our speakers from time to time. Thanksgiving can be be difficult for those who are suffering and there are so many of us with troubles that no one sees. We could talk for hours about the ills that our loved ones are experiencing, sadness and trials. So being thankful may be something we have to work at, even on Thanksgiving.

If your life is like most others, Thursday was probably very busy, either traveling to where you wanted to go or preparing to have others over for the day. Either way, that can be hectic and emotionally trying which doesn’t lend itself to preparing your heart to be reflective and thankful. Thursday was a little bittersweet for me. I miss the old days, my grandparents and my father, and so many others who have passed on, but we are making new memories with friends who are family. The eight year old sits patiently at the dinner table, waiting for the food to be dished out and he says, “What would Thanksgiving be without friends?” Then as we fill up his plate he says to me, “This is quickly becoming overwhelming.” And I asked, “Is that good?” And he says, “Oh yeah.” The four year old has olives on all her fingertips. They are singing at the table. It was a good day and a thankful one. It could have been a hard day, but with a four year old with olives stuck on her fingers, not at all. I used to do that too, with my cousins.

So how can make the holiday season one of gratitude while we are scurrying through the mall? How can we become more like our Savior while wrapping presents or baking pies or scrubbing pots and pans? Well for one we can Remember Him. Several years ago, I saw a picture probably in the Ensign, that showed a woman cooking in her kitchen and her scriptures were open there on the counter. I like that. I even tried it once or twice but then got all worried that the pages would get dirty. Now, I’m a reader. This year according to Shelfari, which I use to keep track, I’ve read 40 books. How many hours upon hours is that spent reading? If I spent half that much time with the scriptures, I would be feasting on the words of Christ. How much could my life change if I put the open scriptures on the kitchen table where they wouldn’t get dirty? I would be inclined to spend more time finding those hidden treasures of knowledge. So that is one way to keep the Lord in mind. We make a covenant when we partake of the sacrament to always remember Him. That means He is a part of our thoughts, words, and our actions. It is impossible to show thanks to God if we don’t think or speak of Him. When we remember Him we are choosing to think, speak, and act as He would have us do. We can even memorize scriptures and quotes on gratitude to help us remember to give thanks to God.

Also, we can serve others - there are ways to be generous toward those with less and not envious of those with more. We tend to look at others who may be wealthier than ourselves and think, "I sure wish I had what they have." But that kind of thinking causes envy and jealousy rather than contentment. What can you do to break that cycle? Well, you can be generous to those who are less fortunate than yourself. All it takes is a little planning and personal sacrifice, then amazingly, opportunities to serve our fellowmen will arise, because the Lord knows we are willing and seeking to serve each other. Those who are in tough times frequently don’t have enough food. So you might want to serve a meal at a food cupboard, and not just during the holidays—everybody works there then—but on a regular basis during the year. That will remind you of how good you really have it.

Another way, is to acknowledge those you love. Tell them how thankful you are for having them in your life. So many times we neglect to take the time to say the words to express to those closest to us what their presence in our lives means to us. Take the opportunity during this season of thanks to write them a note, or put your hand on their shoulder, look them in the eyes and tell them. Let them know what they mean to you. During prayer, you may even wish to tell your Father in heaven how much He means to you. Everyone likes to be acknowledged, even the God of us all. In return you'll begin to create the possibility of deeper, richer, more fulfilling relationships with Him and all those you love.

I do truly love this time of year. I love the cooler weather and the early sunset because it means “cozy.” I like the summer too, with the longer nights, really, but I sure love this time of year. I like flannel sheets and wearing socks and sweaters. I love cooking at night and seeing the kitchen windows steam up because that means we are warm when it is cold outside. Winter cooking is so much better than summer cooking, you know, casseroles and soups and stews. That makes me happy. But when times go well it is easy to take things for granted. Blessings are expected rather than received with gratitude. Have you ever thought about how many things we take for granted every single day? Even sitting down to a meal with your loved ones can be taken for granted. Next time, look around the table. Really see the faces that are there. Don't focus on the food . . . focus on those you share the meal with. Go ahead and say a prayer. Thank God for the food and for your family. I remember doing that in the old days, the days when I wasn’t responsible for preparing the meal. I always sat next to my grandfather, that was my spot. I can still remember who sat where. But the point is, try hard not to take things for granted. Remember the words of King Benjamin, that God has kept and preserved us, lending us breath.

Enjoy this next month, even with all that needs to be done. Think of others and of the love in your life and especially the love that our Heavenly Father and our Savior have for you. Enjoy this feast of love and share it.

Where Oh Where Has My Creativity Gone,

oh, WHERE oh where can it be.......?

I'm out of blog posts.

Thank you to the few of you who comment! I won't forget you. I WILL post again!

Love,

Mary Ann

October 2, 1981

We got married!

30 years ago today.

It was fun.

It's still fun.

We are getting old. That is NOT fun.

We love each other.

Happy Anniversary to US!

Now SING..........

"Take MEOW To The Ballgame!"

Grief is a "Funny" Thing

Right before Elbie died, I was feeding her baby food out of the jar on a tongue depressor. She was chomping down some yummy food. Then the medicine took hold and her little legs gave out and she slept.

Ya know that awful pit in your stomach, or the pain in your chest when your heart is breaking?

I felt it when my father died, and my grandparents, and good friends, and too many relatives to mention. We cry buckets.

I'm crying buckets.

So far this year I've read THIRTY books. Right now I can't even concentrate to read an article.

Years ago, my grandmother said about grief, "Mare, it gets better. It really does somehow. It never goes away but it gets better. If that weren't true, everyone in this world would be walking around crying all the time."

She was a wise woman. And I cried buckets when she died.

Better days are ahead.

Our Sweet Kitty Has Died

This little cat named Elbie, we called her Elbie Lou, was an angel cat. One of the great ones.

We got her in February 1994, at Lollypop Farm. She was in a cage and when she saw us, she put her little face up against the bars and wiggle waggled like she was saying "Oh, PLEASE take me home. PLEASE!!"

She was six months old. Her previous owner wrote on the paperwork at Lollypop that although she was a nice cat, she didn't fit in with the family. I am so glad that happened or she couldn't have been ours.

When we brought her home, she explored the whole house from top to bottom. The first night, she slept in our bed on top of Larry's head!



She was a beautiful cat, with gorgeous eyes and a personality to match. One day I couldn't find her until I looked under my desk. The picture below I caught just as she had finished yawning. That tongue was sticking out.



She loved being held and petted and especially loved having her head rubbed. I wish we had a video of it.



She was a peaceful, happy little cat......



and sometimes quite nosy! I called her Nosy Rosie.



This is the last picture we took of her. She was senile, along with having other medical problems. After prayer, we knew her time had come and she very peacefully passed away at the vet's this morning. I kissed her goodbye, the vet wrapped her in a cute little blanket, then Larry and I left with broken hearts.

I know that millions of people have to go through this every day with their pets, but not too many have had their pets for nearly 18 years.

She was loved by us and she loved us.

This is a little obituary for a very dear pet and part of our family.

ELBIE LOCKE

1993 - 2011

Grand, Grand, Grand

In case anyone hasn't heard, my YANKEES hit three grand slam home runs yesterday, the ONLY time that has ever been done in major league baseball history.

Just letting you know.

AND they beat the Oakland A's 22- 9. Yes, that's 22 runs in one game.

I was just a little ecstatic.

AND just in case you forgot, I LOVE baseball!

Red Cross Day

Some days I just shake my head.

It seems that people who can't pay their rent or need a security deposit believe that the Red Cross will pay it.

They are very surprised when I say that we don't provide that service.

Then there are those who need a place to live but don't have a job or any money. It breaks my heart.

I really like being there to help when we can, like those who have had a fire. But when I can't help, it makes for a hard day. Sometimes the best I can do is refer them to another agency. Sometimes all they need is a listening ear.

I am grateful to our community and the good people who live here who contribute time and money to help others. There sure are a lot of needy people out there.

Good days!

Dear ones,

Today Larry and I went to the temple.

I felt the presence of my grandfather.............

..........who died when I was three months old.

I also felt that things would get better, that things would change, emotionally, mentally and even financially.

It was a beautiful session and I am grateful! Just wanted to let you know.

AND.............move your eyes to the right, to where it says "Mary Ann's ZIJA Blog. Drink Life In!"

Would you mind clicking on it and reading it? I designed it and think it is okay, but would welcome feedback. It's our new business!

Thank you and love to all three of you who read my little blog.

Cute birdie

Lookit this cute baby robin!!

Larry took its picture a couple of days ago while he was hopping around the yard. (The bird, not Larry!)

Rochester? Or Tucson.............

Hot

Dry

Brown

Is this Rochester or is this the desert?

After pretty much the wettest Spring since the dawning of time (or at least the dawning of Rochester) we are in a hot drought. Today the weatherman is calling for possibly 100 degrees with a heat index of 110.

Really?

The grass is brown. The flowers are wilting. PEOPLE are wilting. The Red Cross is opening up cooling stations today.

And speaking of hot, two girlfriends and I went to Toronto Saturday to see the Yankees play the Blue Jays!!

The good - Yankees won! Excellent game, beautiful stadium, being with friends.

The bad - Delays at the border, traffic on the QEW, hard to park, prices at the ball park.

The ugly - ME after sweating in the heat! We finally had to move to outfield seats

where there was shade.

All in all, a great day!

OH! And while we were buying hot dogs at the ballpark Saturday, I started talking to a

young couple who turned out to live right here in our neighborhood!! I loved it.

45,000 people in Toronto Rogers Centre for a ballgame and the two people in line

behind me are from Greece! I mean really.

Of course, this is the man of the year Derek Jeter, taken from our wonderful seats in the hot SUN.

And this is C.C. Sabathia who is the greatest pitcher and who pitched an outstanding game.

Rogers Centre, notice the fancy schmancy Canadian spelling of "center"

And this is Nick Swisher (or maybe Francisco Cervelli) getting ready to smash the ball

And of course as you know, I just LOVE this!!

Love that Jeter

There are three diamonds that I love.

1. My engagement ring

2. Neil Diamond

3. The baseball diamond

Saturday found me ringing my cowbell as I watched the Yankee game on television with my mother-in-law Lee Etta. We were waiting along with the rest of the baseball world for Derek Jeter to hit his 3oooth base hit. It is a VERY big deal.

Me: "Mom, wouldn't it be so cool if Derek's 3000th hit was a home run?"

Lee Etta: "Hmmm!"

Me: (ringing the cowbell) "It would be just the best!"

Lee Etta: "Uh huh"

He hits a home run.

I go crazy. Lee Etta smiles.

Lee Etta: "He did it."

Me: (jumping up and down like a kid and disturbing the peace with the cowbell) "I TOLD you it would be a home run!!!!! Hooray! Hooray!"

I love baseball. I JUST LOVE BASEBALL!!